Thursday, 20 October 2011

A philosophical question

And that question, dear readers is this:-

Why is the Shah such a goon?

God knows, I have blogged about his, ahem, little foibles time after time.  In fact here, here and here just for starters.  But tonight just about plumbed new depths of lunacy, even for him.

So - picture the scene.  All is peaceful at Crap Cottage.  The boy is at Uni.  The girl is out at a friend's house.  My mother has only phoned three times (once in the middle of the day when I was in a meeting) to tell me she needs a new washing up bowl and the Shah's mother has only phoned the once to complain that he never visits (he went last week).  We are enjoying a civilised supper.  Just as we finish eating, I turn my head slightly and catch sight of the family calendar hanging on the wall.  There are four columns for each week - one for each of us.  On Thursday, in the Shah's column it says one word.


Yes, the Shah is meant to be out at a curry night with his footie mates.  

What a goon.  

Does he phone them up and feign illness?  Does he phone them and 'fess up?  No he does not.  He rushes upstairs like a cat with a firework up its bum, changes his clothes at the speed of light and heads out of the door yelling "Feck!  Now I'm going to have to eat all over again!"  

Like the Shah, only paler
And he wonders why he can't lose weight.....*sigh*


  1. That's one helluva belly! Did he feel a bit ill when he came back, or did he just nibble delicately while he was out?

  2. Oh but you see I see the Shah's point!
    If he ducked out of this night the wheels might start coming off the whole routine and curry nights die out.
    Also he would miss the craic....

    I worry I may be a man....

  3. They really operate in a different way to us don't they?....guess that might be part of the appeal......

  4. Sarah - apparently he "didn't eat very much but nobody noticed". It defies belief really!

    Macy - The Shah would rather chew off his own leg than miss the craic - shy and retiring he is not.

  5. Libby - is that a polite way of saying that he's a raving nutter? If so, you'd be absolutely right :-)

  6. I'm with the Shah on that one. I could always eat a curry whatever I scoffed before!!! AAh now I feel like the chicken tikka masala from Khans in Notting Hill - there are no good Indian places here in East Bay - they are so scared of spices and heat!

  7. Ah, the curry is the least important part of a curry night. The main agenda is the name calling, mickey taking and character assassination of your friends.

    Although I could quite happily do a Chicken Rogan Josh, now you mention it.....

  8. Jody - I really fancy a stint on the West Coast so we won't mention anything about lack of spicy food to the Shah, just in case!

    Andy - with every passing comment, I become more sure that you and the Shah were separated at birth. Funnily enough, every time someone asks him to recommend an Indian restaurant, he says "my house" so it's all round to ours for a Madras then!


Oh go on - say something for God's sake...